Domestic violence almost always repeats itself. Until you are ready to leave for good, it’s a good idea to plan for that “next time.”

• Practice leaving your home safely…which doors, windows, or stairwells would you use in emergency?
• Keep a packed bag with copies of important papers, medications, and other essentials with a friend or relative in case you need to leave quickly.
• Tell a neighbor about your situation and ask them to call police if they hear a disturbance.
• Pick a safety code word to use with family and friends when you want them to call police.

An order of protection is issued by the court to prohibit your abuser from abusing, stalking or sexually assaulting you. The court will ask you to prove that you are in immediate danger, so the order of protection includes more detail and documentation than a police report.  The abuser will be “served” the order telling him or her to stay away from you.

Safety with a protective order:

• Keep a copy of your order with you and have copies in your car, at work, and with family or friends.
• Make sure family, friends, and co-workers know about the order.

If police need to be called, ask for the police report number afterward.

Leaving is hard. Remember, your abuser has invested a lot of time manipulating you into thinking that you can’t survive without them and that you deserved to be hit or threatened. It’s no wonder that on average someone tries to leave a violent relationship seven times before they are successful.

Every situation is different. The Family Safety Center staff can help you create a plan specific to your situation. Leaving is a process, it does not happen overnight, but we can help you file an order of protection, get legal advice, and arrange for emergency shelter in one visit. Our community partners provide ongoing counselling and support groups. You are not alone.